Political Satire – MIDROC purchases Tigrai – By our Special Correspondent

April 21st, 2008 Print Print Email Email

It was reported today that the Saudi Billionaire Sheik Al-Amoudi’s company MIDROC International has purchased the regional state of Tigrai in Northern Ethiopia. Sources report the sale was finalized after a marathon session held in the Penthouse of Addis Abeba Sheraton. Representing Tigrai were Special Advisor Abo Sebehatu, Sidekick to the PM Bereket Semeon and financial head of EFFORT Ato Arkebe Uqbai. The PM was unable to participate due to a technical glitch caused by Ethiotelecom. The PM was logged in as a proxy but unfortunately a technician inadvertently blocked his connection. Our effort to interview the poor individual did not go anywhere since his whereabouts is unknown at the moment. (more…)

It was reported today that the Saudi Billionaire Sheik Al-Amoudi’s company MIDROC International has purchased the regional state of Tigrai in Northern Ethiopia. Sources report the sale was finalized after a marathon session held in the Penthouse of Addis Abeba Sheraton. Representing Tigrai were Special Advisor Abo Sebehatu, Sidekick to the PM Bereket Semeon and financial head of EFFORT Ato Arkebe Uqbai. The PM was unable to participate due to a technical glitch caused by Ethiotelecom. The PM was logged in as a proxy but unfortunately a technician inadvertently blocked his connection. Our effort to interview the poor individual did not go anywhere since his whereabouts is unknown at the moment.

With the cost of war in Somalia skyrocketing, gold bullions turning to lead, Diaspora investment in real estate plummeting, inflation nearing 38%, this is a new strategy by the Ethiopian government to raise some needed cash. It is rumored that the wealthy Sheik spurned the offers of major US investment house like Merrill Lynch and Bear Stern to be part of this sale due to his Visa denial by US Homeland Security. It is believed the Swiss Banking giant Credit Suisse was the go between for the sale.

This is the first acquisition of a regional state by MIDROC Inc. Sheik Al-Amoudi is heard to have said that he would like to be crowned in the city of Axum. He has already drawn up plans to change the flag and affix his cresent coat of arms. Inside sources have informed our reporter that Medrock Inc. is in discussion with the American Security firm ‘Blackwater USA’ regarding deployment of the TPLF militia into Darfur to recoup some of its expenses. A resident of Mekele is heard to have said ‘what next, sell the Obelisks to Disney Land for rock climbing, this is the end of us’. This rumor has raised MIDROC stocks on Wall Street to open 10% higher at the opening of trade this morning.

According to inside sources this has angered Ato Addisu Legese’ the petty governor of the ‘Amhara’ State. He was quoted as saying ‘it is always Tigrai first, we would like you to know that he could have gotten our region for way cheaper’. He has made his anger known by boycotting the Sheraton and moving his entourage to the Hilton. ‘We are not welcome there, we want you to know that Hilton is our destination from now on’ he shouted as he climbed in his specially equipped ‘Range Rover’ a gift from his friend Vicky ‘there is no Kinijit” Huddleston, former charge de affair of the US. The Oromo state petty tyrant Ato Aba Dulla Gemeda has not been informed about the sale. As they say in Arat Kilo ‘he is not in the loop’.

As is customary Beyne Petros is withholding all comments until he has talked this with his personal TPLF handler who is in Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia scouting for a fitting palace for the ‘Grand Tyrant’ and family. Poor Ledetu is scheduled to be part of the first Brigade leaving for Darfur. TPLF has fittingly assigned him to be ‘morale officer’ to the troops.

Sources unwilling to be named have indicated TPLF regime is in negotiations with Columbian Medellin or Cali drug cartel regarding the sale of Southern Peoples and Nationalities.

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